Boys...

I'm typing this in my bed on my phone at 3 in the morning. Why am I not asleep yet? Well I fell asleep at 11 and woke up half an hour ago so I decided to post another random blog. Today's will be about guys and why I don't have one yet.

I can say I haven't actually had a real boyfriend yet. I had one back in high school but I don't think that one really counts. I used to think it was because I'm ugly.. but I'm happy to say that way of thinking has changed. I know I'm not gorgeous but I'm not ugly. My best friend says maybe it's because I'm too picky. I don't think so. She also thinks I don't put myself out there enough. I don't think so either. So then why am I still single? I have no idea. I've had a person say maybe I intimidate guys. He said it was because I'm pretty so guys are afraid to come up to me. Or they would figure I already have a boyfriend because I'm so pretty. Haha he sure made me laugh. It was really nice of him to say that though.

Sometimes I'd see couples together and wish I had a boyfriend. Sometimes I'd hear my friends complain about their relationships and I'd be glad I'm single. Other times I'm indifferent. But mostly I wish I had someone just be there..to hold me and care about me. Sometimes I think I should make the first move, but it's so hard. I'm not really that outgoing. I'm better than before but I'm still kinda shy at times. This may sound stupid but I'm kind of traditional in the sense that guys should make the first move. I know they appreciate it when girls step up and make that initial move. But still... it's easier said than done.

Maybe I'll try harder the next time I go out and see a guy I like. I'll make eye contact and give him a smile. I'll never know unless I try right? I'm going to keep on believing and hoping that things will turn out alright in the end. :)

Good night.